Oh, the Places You'll Go!

The new year has been up and running for nearly a week now, and I have failed to really grab it by the horns. I've never really been one for new year resolutions; I have more of a new day kind of attitude. This year feels different though, like I need to make a conscientious effort to mark this year with something - as if living on the other side of world for most of it isn't enough. I've always thought New Year's was tremendously overrated, so I don't know what I'm thinking of or looking for, but there is a desire to stick my flag in this lot and let everyone know I was here, to stake my claim so to speak. With so much time (mostly alone) on my hands, I've been rather reflective on the year past, and things have been brought to my attention that I quite possibly never would have thought of if not in the position that I am. I have days when I am so motivated its nearly frightening because I don't know where to start, and I don't want to disappoint myself. Then I will have a string of days which lead me to do nothing but lye in bed watching TV. I've always found it ironic that I can trust other people so much easier than myself.......especially when I can only pinpoint about 2 people in my life who haven't expressed some inkling of faith in me. I've grown up in an atmosphere of people who have encouraged, supported, and counseled. Yet it seems to take so much more. I want to believe that I can, and really that's all: just that I can. But I'm realizing that in order to gain that assurance, you need to expose the things that you don't and should.
I should eat less sugar and take more pictures; I should watch less TV and write more; I don't pray enough, especially for other people; I should start learning Korean and Spanish and Latin again; I wish I painted or made pottery; I don't keep in touch with enough people; I could use to floss more.
How do I keep moving forward and not get caught standing still, yet soak this all up like a Brawny Paper Towel?
Like I said, I don't really know what my expectations are. I only know that time can be alarming when you don't know where its taking you. I'll let you know where I end up.